Masthead header
4.4.06

Intro

Yo, this is mark.  I’m not sure if I need to introduce myself, since I think the only people who regularly read this site are myself, Shannen and Dan.  Anyway, I was drunkenly asked on Saturday night if I wanted to be a guest-blogger (though I prefer the term “columnist”, as it sounds more professional, and could therefore be used to round-out my woefully inadequate resume), so here I am. 

Anyway, I’ll contribute the occasional rant when I can.  Future rant topics may or may not include:

  • Why Seals are Assholes
  • Why the Juno Awards are embarassing
  • The stupidity (and addictiveness) of Deal or No Deal
  • The uselessness of the 1% GST deduction
  • The Scotiabank Place parking situation
  • Patrick Elias’s STDs
  • The guy at work who drives an Aztec

You get the idea.  As Frank Costanza said, “I got a lot of problems with you people!  And now you’re gonna hear about it!”.  Should be fun. 

Last 5 songs heard on my iPod:  “Stop” – Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, “Shaking Paper” – Cat Power, “No Life Singed Her” – Pavement, “Hoppipolla” – Sigur Ros, “The Masterplan” – Oasis

Filed in: Friends
comment
April 5, 2006 - 10:39 am

Shan - Mark,

You are the best guest blogger we’ve ever had.

Shannen

April 5, 2006 - 10:58 am

Gary - Mark, I look forward to your list of topic discussions. I caution you though, it’s not a good idea to rant about coworkers online, even if they drive an Aztec. I saw a blog recently where the blogger was recently unemployed because she talked about the office people in less than a good light. For some reason, employers don’t like the published, online ranting about the office. Go figure.

April 5, 2006 - 11:00 am

Carole - Hey Mark,

My name is Carole. I’ve been a long time friend of Shannen and in more recent years Dan.

I thought I would be the first to add a comment to your rant, and I also wanted to let you know that I too frequent this site. I enjoy the rants, and I will look forward to possibly hearing about “Why Seals are Assholes”. I am oddly intrigued about the guy who drives the Aztec as well.

Cheers,

Carole

April 5, 2006 - 7:22 pm

mark - holy crap! readers!

shan: i’ll try not to dissapoint.

gary: noted. although really, if one buys an Aztek, shouldn’t one expect sarcastic/mean-spirited blog entries at ones expense? It seems reasonable.

carole: hi! I don’t know if I’m actually going to write that seals rant. People are a bit too passionate about seals right now. Maybe later.

4.4.06

Poor Kenny

I am a Kenny Rogers fan. The Kenny Rogers Greatest Hits album with The Gambler, Lady, Coward of the County, and other great songs that tell a story was a formative album in my teenage years. And I later discovered more obscure Kenny in the form of Just Dropped In (To See What Condition My Condition Was In) from the Big Lebowski soundtrack, which he recorded in 1968 with First Edition.

All of that said, I don’t think I’d recognize him now if I passed him on the street. I’m dismayed to add him to the growing list of people that have modified their appearance beyond recognition.Plastic Kenny

At least he doesn’t have collagen in his lips. I don’t think. What a terrible trend.

Filed in: Entertainment | Rants | Weird Stuff
comment
April 4, 2006 - 1:48 pm

Kel - Hi Dan. I’m Kel. I work with Shan, and love your cats. I also love my own (four) cats. I just love cats. And all the other things on cuteoverload.com, which your wife now has me hooked on. Like I need another web addiction. Thanks very much.

Anyway–uh, are you sure that’s Kenny? Seriously, when I saw this pic, I assumed this was some “tribute” performer. I’m no kind of a fan of the Kenster, but I do think it’s a shame–and very, very scary–if this is really him.

April 4, 2006 - 3:41 pm

dan - Hi Kel,

It’s true. I don’t want it to be true. But it is. Here’s his official site.

Sad Dan

April 5, 2006 - 9:57 am

Kel - Sigh . . . .

3.31.06

Funny place names and fun with search

Shannen and I are shopping for a new house. Ottawa isn’t as crazy as Calgary, but we’re still looking at more than $250,000 for a single family home.

Out of curiosity, I searched the area of Saskatchewan that our family is from on mls.ca. There are homes starting under $10,000, but nicer homes are over $100,000.

And then I came across one that opened with “Enjoy the relaxed & peaceful lifestyle that the community of Eyebrow has to offer.” Eyebrow, SK. One of the many interesting place names in the province. Others include:

  • Elbow
  • Climax
  • Semans
  • Smuts
  • and of course Moose Jaw

You could also be in the market for a whole mess of land. How does 3000 acres grab you?

Or you could move to one of Jason’s favourite places, Windthorst, SK
.

MLS is fun!

Filed in: Weird Stuff
comment
March 31, 2006 - 3:29 pm

Jen - Wow you could live like a King in Windthorst! Imagine a $250K house there? Although you would be subjected to taking your old job back at Roluf’s Esso. 😐 And therefore would could not afford that house. So, nevermind.

I have an addiction to mls. Did you check out the Calgary listings? There is hardly anything worthwhile or affordable these days. You know it’s bad when there are bidding wars on grow-op houses. It’s insane!

3.31.06

A breath of fresh smoke?

Puff, puff, smoke, smoke.

A post or two ago I discussed my sheer glee at the long-awaited return of spring.  This stills holds true for me, but I realized that spring brings something else with it – the uninhibited smoker.  For most of winter these folks hide from the elements in cars, doorways, and alleys, but at this time of year they are free to roam about as they please, exhaling in the general direction of passers-by.

Now don’t get me wrong.  I was once a smoker and I know how it feels to be shunned, sent outdoors, and endlessly harrassed about the dangers of smoking.  I also know the reality of having the precious few places where your habit is acceptable begin to vanish before your eyes…I get it.  Tough times.  BUT I think I was always a conscientious smoker.  I made efforts not to be in the way or to let that stream of smoke from the end of my cigarette trail towards the only non-smoker in the room.  And I don’t see the same kind of respect very often anymore.  It’s almost as if the smokers have banded together to punish those who have wronged them, i.e. non-smokers.

So I guess that’s why it bothers me to have to hold my breath and duck out of the way of the long line of smokers who crowd the front of my office building.  There is a sign (or should I say ‘small sticker’) posted that clearly says NO SMOKING WITHIN 9 METERS OF THE DOOR.  No one follows this rule.  I often feel the urge to point it out, but I haven’t had the guts to yet.  Then I’d always just be ‘that girl’ to them.   My suggestion: change the sign to NO SMOKING WITHIN 9 METERS OF THE DOOR or you risk being kicked in the kneecaps.  I think that would get their attention. 

Has anyone seen my steel-toed boots?

Filed in: Photos | Rants
comment
March 31, 2006 - 10:20 am

dan - As an addendum to that: Why aren’t cigarette butts considered litter?

Pet peeve #3 on my list (the other two will come out on this blog at some point) is people flicking their butts out the window while stopped at traffic lights. My urge is to get out of my car, grab the still smoldering butt, and toss it back into their car window, saying “I think you dropped this”.

Most of these people wouldn’t throw their McDonald’s garbage out the window while whistling down the highway to North Gower or Cornwall. But they have no qualms about making their nasty morning filter deposit at curbsite.

Ca me fache.

3.30.06

Welcome to your Carlsberg years, Dan-o.

c6bc.jpg

I’ve been waiting about 446 days for this.  It’s about damn time.

 

Filed in: Family | Life | Photos
comment
March 30, 2006 - 10:59 am

Jen - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

March 30, 2006 - 2:35 pm

dan - Mmm Carlsberg. That gives me an idea.

…

…

What was I saying? Nope. Lost it.

If you can remind me what my idea was, please do so.

March 30, 2006 - 2:39 pm

Kris - Awww…cute pic.

Happy Birthday Dan!